The General Hospital Cell Block Tango
by YuroAnei1292
Summary: What happens when Six ladies explain how they murdered their boyfriends and husbands? A very stange story. But hey, I betcha you would have done the same. Songfic to Chicago's the Cell Block Tango.


General hospital Tango

Note: I do not own General hospital or the cell block tango. I did change some of the lyrics to fit the story.

The story begins in a dark room, dim lights shine on six women.

Carly: Shot

Emily: Six

Elizabeth: Squish

Robin: Uh-uh

Alexis: Metro Court

Georgie: Dillion.

Police officer: And now the six Port Charles murderesses of the Port Charles jail in their rendition of…the cell block tango.

Carly: Shot

Emily: Six

Elizabeth: Squish

Robin: Uh-uh

Alexis: Metro Court

Georgie: Dillion.

The lights brighten to reveal the women in black dresses.

Carly: Shot

Emily: Six

Elizabeth: Squish

Robin: Uh-uh

Alexis: Metro Court

Georgie: Dillion.

The music grows faster.

Carly: Shot

Emily: Six

Elizabeth: Squish

Robin: Uh-uh

Alexis: Metro Court

Georgie: Dillion.

(x1)

All:

He had it coming  
He had it coming  
He only had himself to blame  
if you'd have been there  
if you'd have seen it

Alexis: I betcha you would have done the same!

Carly: Shot

Emily: Six

Elizabeth: Squish

Robin: Uh-uh

Alexis: Metro Court

Georgie: Dillion.

(x1)

Carly steps forward as the lights go to her.

Carly: You know how some people have these habits that really get you down, like Sonny.

Sonny appears and starts dancing with Carly.

Carly: Sonny had a horrible habit of suggesting what I should do, no not suggesting, telling me. So I came to his house to get my sons, and I told him I was marring Jax, and he suggested that was a bad idea…no, not suggested. HE TOLD ME it was a bad idea. So you know what I told him. I told him you say one more word.

Carly puts her face in Sonny's face.

Carly: And he did, so I took the shot gun off the wall and I fired two warning shots….

Carly reaches from the back of Sonny's shirt and pulls out a red scarf.

Carly: Into his head….

Carly dances around Sonny.

All:

He had it coming.  
He had it coming.  
He only had himself to blame.  
If you'd have been there.  
If you'd have heard it.  
I betcha you would.  
Have done the same!

Carly kicks Sonny to the ground and puts the scarf over his head as the lights turn to Emily.

Emily: I met Nicholas Cassidine from Greece several years ago.

Nicholas steps forward as Emily and Him waltz with the music.

Emily: And he told me he was single, and we hit it off right away, so we got married. He'd go to work he'd come home. I'd fix him a drink. We'd have dinner. Then I found out, single he told me, SINGLE MY ASS! Not only did he have another girlfriend. Oh no he had six other girls.

Emily puts Nicholas to the ground and then climbs on top of him.

Emily: One of those Mormons, you know. So that night, when he came home, I fixed him his drink as usual.

Emily kisses Nicholas and then pulls a red scarf out of his mouth.

Emily: You know, some guys just can't hold their arsenic.

Nicholas pushes Emily off and tries to run but Emily gets up and jumps on Nicholas's back and wraps the scarf tight around his Neck.

All:

He had it coming.  
He had it coming.  
He took a flower in its prime.  
and then he used it.  
and he abused it.  
It was a murder, but not a crime!

Nicholas falls to ground as Emily pulls the scarf away from his neck. The light turns away from Emily throwing the scarf onto Nicholas. And goes to Elizabeth standing next to Lucky, they start dancing together.

Elizabeth: Now I was standing in the kitchen, carvin' up the chicken for dinner, minding my own business. Then in storms my husband Lucky in a jealous rage.

Jason comes out and takes Elizabeth away from Lucky and starts dancing with him.

Elizabeth: You been screwing the hit man! He says, he was crazy.

Lucky takes Elizabeth and holds her close.

Elizabeth: And he kept on screaming, you been screwing the hit man!"

Elizabeth hits Lucky's stomach and pulls out a red scarf.

Elizabeth: And then he ran into my knife….He ran into my knife TEN TIMES!

All:

If you'd have been there.  
If you'd have seen it.  
I betcha you would have done the same.

Lucky falls to the ground as Elizabeth kisses Jason; the lights then turn to Robin who steps forward with Patrick as they start dancing. (Note: I know this Hungarian, but I used to think it was French and Robin's been to Paris, so work with me on the one.)

Robin: Mit kersek, en itt? Azt mondjok, hogy a hires lakem lefogta a ferjemet en meg   
lecsaptam a fejet. De nem igaz, en artatlan vagyok. Nem tudom mert mondja Patrick hogy en tettem. Probaltam a rendorsegen megmayarazni de nem ertettek meg...

Patrick and Robin stop dancing as Elizabeth stands in the light.

Elizabeth: Yeah, but did you do it?

Robin: Uh-uh! NOT GUILTY!

Robin pulls a white scarf from Patrick's shirt; the lights turn off on them and turn to Alexis, Ric and Sam start dancing around her.

Alexis: I gave my daughter Sam up for adoption when I was 16, and my husband Ric helped me find her again. Now after we found Sam we moved into this cozy little home, and this one night it was too hot so the three of us got a room at the Metro Court…the three of us boozing, having a few laughs. And we ran out of Ice so I go out to get some. I come back, open the door, and there's Sam and Ric, doing a spread eagle!

Ric and Sam stop Dancing as Alexis walks around them.

Alexis: Well I was in such a state of shock, I completely black out…I can't remember a thing.

Alexis steps in front of Ric and Sam as the light goes off them. Then two red scarves fall from Alexis's hands.

Alexis: It wasn't in till I was washing the blood off my hands. I even knew THEY WERE DEAD!

Alexis throws the scarves behind her.

Alexis: They had it coming!

Others: They had it coming!

Alexis: They had it coming!

Others: They had it coming!

Alexis: They had it coming all along…

Others: They had it coming all along!

Alexis: I didn't do it!

Others: She didn't do it!

Alexis: But if I done it.

Others: If she had done it.

Alexis: How could you tell me that I was wrong?

Alexis: They had it coming.

Others: They had it coming. 

Alexis: They had it coming. 

Others: They had it coming. 

Alexis: They had it coming. 

Others: They took a flower in it's prime.

Alexis: They had it coming all along. I didn't do it.

Others: And then they used it.

Alexis: But if I'd done it, how could you tell me that I was wrong?

The lights go dark again, then on shines on Georgie and Dillion as they start dancing.

Georgie: I loved Dillion more than I could possibly say. He was a real artistic guy…sensitive…a director. But he was always trying to find himself…he went out every night looking for himself, and on the way he found Lulu! Maxie! Dana! and Diego… I guess you could say we broke up because of our artistic differences... he saw himself as alive.

Georgie pulls a red scarf from Dillon's shirt.

Georgie: And I SAW HIM DEAD!

Georgie pushes Dillion down. As the lights shines on everyone.

All: The dirty bum, bum, bum, bum, bum  
The dirty bum, bum, bum, bum, bum

They had it coming!

They had it coming!

They had it coming all along.

Cause if they use us!

And they abuse us!

How could you tell us that we were wrong?

He had it coming!

He had it coming!

He only had himself to blame!

If you had been there!

If you had seen it!

I betcha you would have down the same!

Carly: If you say one more word!

Emily: Single my ass!

Elizabeth: Ten times!

Robin: Miert csukott Patrick bortonbe.

Alexis: Number seventeen the spread eagle.

Georgie: Artistic differences!

They all stand together.

Carly: Shot

Emily: Six

Elizabeth: Squish

Robin: Uh-uh

Alexis: Metro Court

Georgie: Dillion.

The lights go off.


End file.
